A Chance to Hang Out With the Elderly Gentlemen on The Third Floor
by ThaliaKitten
Summary: The action will end up in Austin, Texas 2004, with stops in Maine and California. Hawkeye and BJ plot, plan and have a good time. It's a long time since Korea 1952, and a lot has happened in 50 years. Meet their wives, their families and take a glance through the years and a chance to see how things stay the same no matter how much they change.
1. Chapter 1

1) The Courtship of Carmen Clayton, as told by herself

Carmen Clayton methodically plunked her arms in the swimming pool. Right, left, right, left went the arms, went the cadence in her mind. Her yellow swimsuit cut through the water steadily, steadily as one could get in a new pool filled with screaming kids, fellow lap swimmers and wave-making cannonball creators. Crabapple Cove, Maine had a brand new community pool, as well as a brand new second grade teacher. The summer of 1959 had dawned not so brightly on a new graduate of the Concordia Teacher's College. Jobs were not so scarce in her hometown, but she needed to spread her wings and leave some memories behind. Finally, an old roommate had heard of an opening in the town nearest her grandparents. A small town, climate not desirable, but she needed this job.

She pulled out of the pool after lap 32, congratulating herself on a mile well swam. The swim cap was more of a struggle; Carmen had lots of thick hair that did not take lightly to being contained. There were eyes on her, always watching. Dark hair and darker skin stood out in a small northern town. It was the same in her town, actually, even though Austin, Texas was larger than Crabapple Cove. People were friendly, of course, but with a catch. You watched the new people, made them prove themselves before you befriended them, almost rather wanting a slip-up in decorum and an opportunity to gossip than a successful integration into the community. Carmen could, no, would handle it. She could teach, and she didn't have a lot left in Austin.

A pair of piercing blue eyes caught her gaze. An older man was following her every move. He was certainly attractive, but definitely older than where she normally looked. She mentally checked herself, and continued to the ladies' locker room. First fit in, then worry about everything else. Especially men nearly 20 years older! Surprisingly, she stared back at him, dark brown eyes questioning him. Gosh, he seemed older to her, maybe near 40.

Carmen pulled her hair into a tight bun and applied some lip gloss; there was no need to make her self up properly when a night at home with partially completed lesson plans awaited her. She picked up her satchel and started out the door, her mind on flash cards and one minute addition quizzes. Her focus closed her eyes to the man leaving the men's locker room at the same time. It wasn't until she was on the floor until Carmen realized she wasn't walking anymore.

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" She sputtered. Oh dear, the man's belongings had spilled out of his bag. She frantically started picking things up and shoving them into the open bag.

"No, no, I wasn't looking, don't worry about it. Do you need a hand?" he gallantly asked.

It was him, the man with the blue eyes. Carmen blushed to her roots. He was quite attractive close up. What a way to meet people, make impressions and possibly cause a bruise or two. Not the best way to start the evening.

"Hawkeye Pierce. You're quite the swimmer, you know," offering his hand. "I'm here to exercise my eyes as well as my body. It's boring work walking in a straight line in a square pool with people crowding in and minding my business as well as everyone else's. It's quite the treat to the eyes, watching the delicious surroundings in a variety of swimsuits and color. You are quite the treat to look at, too." He gave her a grin than Carmen knew he had honed on every other woman in town over the past few years. She would be polite and on her way. No one would take her seriously if the first thing she did was get involved with the town Lothario.

"I'm Carmen Clayton. I lived right by a stream growing up. It was sunny and warm all year, so learning to swim was one of the first things I remember. No indoor pools, however." She picked up her bag, handed him his and began walking.

"Sunny and warm? The very definition of our one day of summer here in Crabapple Cove," he joked. "Tell me where, and do slow down."

"Oh, sorry," she shortened her gait a tad and continued on. "Austin, Texas. Our swimming hole was 68 degrees year round, which felt ice cool in the summer, and warm in the winter." Their strides matched up, moving across the grass. He was going to be harder to shake than she thought. "Wait, did you say your name was Hawkeye?"

"My dad's favorite book, Last of the Mohicans." Hawkeye stared into her eyes. "Listen, you seem a little skittish, which just wouldn't do. Hey, look, why don't I walk you to your car. We'll decide where to go to dinner from there."

Oh, boy, she had pegged him correctly; he had an advanced degree in smooth-talking. Carmen was not having any of this, not even if he was handsome. "No, thanks. My mother always warned me not to talk to strangers," she said with a grimace.

"Wait, you're getting the wrong idea," Hawkeye protested, even though Carmen was sure she had exactly the correct idea. "You're new in town, right? I've lived here my whole life, and at the very least, let me show you around. Besides, I'm not a stranger. You know my name, don't you?" That brought a reluctant grin to Carmen's face. "What brought you to Crabapple Cove?"

The duo arrived at Carmen's little blue car. "A new job. I will be teaching second grade this year at the elementary school. I just don't want to get off on the wrong foot with the people in town."

"Don't worry at all," Hawkeye reassured her. "I'm the good doctor, well, one of the good doctor Pierces in town. Here, drop your bag off, and we'll walk. It's not far at all. Besides, I need a new swimming friend, especially one who is easy on the eyes."

Carmen through her satchel into the car and locked the door. "Well, I guess it can't hurt, especially if you keep your hands to your self." Hawkeye threw his hands up in the air. She smiled at that. "Hawkeye, tell me about Crabapple Cove." The two leisurely strolled on Main Street, casually talking. Carmen relaxed as the storefronts came into view. It would be nice to have a local show her around, and despite his leer and come-ons, Hawkeye so far had the behavior of a gentleman.

They paused at the glass panes of an appliance store, Carmen staring at the couple in the reflection. Her, with her hair pulled back but tiny wisps escaping every which way, hands stuffed in the pockets of her skirt. Him, more pepper than salt hair, gangly, taller than her by a head, slight hunch in the shoulders, leaning on the cane. His eyes were beautiful, though, a bright robin's egg blue. She stared at them in the glass until they met her back.

Hawkeye smiled at her in the mirror. Carmen realized he caught her and she blushed, dropping her gaze. She felt the warmth of a hand on the small of her back, and began walking forward.

"Just because I was watching you doesn't mean anything else, Hawkeye," she warned him. He removed his hand, but matched her pace.

"Don't worry about it," he reassured her. "It's nice to know I'm not the only one staring in this relationship." He gave her a cheeky grin, and they continued down Main Street, Hawkeye giving a running description of the shops and the owners. Several people said hello, but gave her a curious look.

"So, you have already found the new girl in town, surprising no one, correct?" she asked him.

"I'll admit I work fast," he said with a grin. "Look, here's the diner. Want a cup of coffee?"

Carmen and Hawkeye ordered drinks and rolls. He told her about working with his dad as the town doctor and surgeon on occasion. He briefly touched on the war, mentioning all that came out of it was his best friend, the ability to stand on his head and not a lot of wish to do anything else. She talked about her school, and growing up in Austin with an eccentric father. They compared books they had read, places they had visited and people they admired.

Carmen's first shock of the evening was when their waitress had asked them if she could go home. Night had fallen, chairs were up on the tables and the diner was empty. It was close to nine in the evening, and they had talked for four hours straight. Hawkeye paid the bill, escorted her back to her car, and asked her out for dinner, a real date, the following evening.

Carmen's second shock of the evening was that she said yes.

Carmen woke up the next morning wondering if she had dreamt last night's meeting with Dr. Hawkeye Pierce. He was attractive to her, and she enjoyed the easy banter between them. He made her think, and she loved his quick wit. At the very least, that was enough for a first date. Anything more would happen when it happened. She put on her dressing robe and went to the kitchen for breakfast.

Her landlord was at the table, most likely waiting for her. Carmen rented a room in a big, rambling Victorian a few blocks from the center of town. She had her own room, but the bathroom and common areas were all shared with four other boarders. Doris the owner, a good-hearted but rather nosy woman, made sure she knew what was going on in every room of the house.

"Good morning, Doris," Carmen rang out as she opened her cabinet. She plucked a banana from the bunch, and grabbed a jar of peanut butter. After grabbing a knife and plate, she made her way to the table and began dicing the banana.

"So, Hawkeye Pierce has already found you, hasn't he," was Doris' reply. "He's a little old for you, isn't he? You'll be just another one of his long line of broken hearts."

Another morning, another interrogation. This had been going on for the two weeks that Carmen had lived there. Normally, Doris expressed daily concern over Carmen's work habits, her need for a daily swim or her lack of local friends. A real man to talk about? This might keep Doris busy for the rest of the week.

"My heart's fine," Carmen said. "We met at the pool, had coffee and just talked. I'm a big girl, you know."

"He's twice your age! What would your parents say about that?" Doris scolded her.

"My parents were unconventional, to say the least. I'm 21, and he's 38. It could be worse," even though she silently acknowledged Doris' point. Carmen knew she needed a way to end the conversation. Maybe psuedo-confiding in her would help. "Just to let you know, we're going out to dinner tonight, nothing fancy. And I'll be home at a reasonable hour." She pulled away from the table, and began washing her utensils.

"I'll be keeping on eye on the clock tonight, Miss Clayton," Doris stated as Carmen made her way to the kitchen door. "Nothing fishy under my roof!"

"I promise, Doris, there will be nothing fishy tonight," Carmen sighed. Then she gave a grin. "It's Italian, so not even fish for dinner."

The rest of the day went slowly. Carmen made flash cards, planned her first science unit, and went to the pool. Hawkeye was going to pick her up at 6. She was primed and ready, waiting in the front by 5:45 with Doris at her side. Doris was chattering away about her hair and make-up, and Carmen gave non-committal replies. Why was she nervous? Yes, they had a good time last night, but there were so many differences between the two, not even counting their ages.

Hawkeye knocked on the door, perched on the porch with a daisy in his hand. Doris jumped up to answer it.

"My, my, Hawkeye. I thought you brought every girl a rose. Isn't that what you brought me?" Doris flirted with him. She leaned in a little to close for comfort. Carmen grimaced. Hawkeye caught her expression and smiled.

"My dear Doris, Carmen is more than just a rose, does she?" he replied. Carmen grabbed her sweater for a quick exit. Hawkeye stuck the flower behind her ear, and held the door open for her. "Don't wait up, dear Doris. I'll have her back safe, sound and snug as a slug on your doorstep by dawn."

"I've got an eye on you, Hawkeye!" Doris exclaimed as the couple made their way to Hawkeye's gold sedan. He held open the passenger door as Carmen slid in.

"I'm sorry about that, Carmen," Hawkeye apologized as he started the car.

"When did you bring Doris a rose?" Carmen asked, incredulous.

"I'll admit I did ask Doris out, once, when I was a freshman in high school, and yes, I did bring a rose. However, seniors generally did not look at freshman, much less take them to homecoming. I believe it was for the best, seeing as I get to take her comely boarder out to dinner tonight instead." Hawkeye grinned at her. "Italian still okay?"

"Well, I'd rather have Mexican, but I don't think we would make the drive down to Texas and back before bedtime this evening," she grinned. "Burritos, enchiladas, salsa and queso are all so delicious."

"Queso?" he questioned her. Carmen began happily chatting about all the delicious things one could add to melted cheese. They compared favorite cuisines, Hawkeye telling her about Korean and Japanese foods.

They arrived at the restaurant and a waiter escorted them to a table in the back, complete with red-checked tablecloth and a dripping candle. Violin music played in the background.

"Laying it on kind of thick, aren't you, Hawkeye?" Carmen surveyed the room. "I feel like I'm in a movie."

"All for you, my dear. Humphrey and Ingrid will be making their appearances soon for our evening's entertainment," he mockingly assured her.

"I take it you've already ordered then," she said with a raised eyebrow.

"You've guessed incorrectly, Miss Clayton. Someone who knows several different foreign words for 'cheese' will always get to order whatever she wants." Hawkeye opened her menu with a flourish. "All of Italy, at your fingertips, minus the boat ride over the ocean."

Carmen perused the menu and selected a simple pasta with tomato sauce. Salads and soup came with the meal, as well. Surprisingly, Hawkeye didn't order a bottle of wine, but a glass of lemonade. He caught her expression.

"Let's save trouble and taxing explanations for later, shall we? I only drink when I want to, not when I need to, anymore, but don't let that stop you. I want to do other things," Hawkeye said with a waggle of his eyebrows after the waiter left. Karen shook her head no, grinning with amusement. "First let's decide to not like each other, then we can yell and call each other names and bring up skeletons in our closets."

"Only if you let me go home first," she smiled. "I haven't had time to dress my skeletons in the proper outfits."

"My skeletons are bare to the bone, so no worries. But leaving before the salad course? What would the town gossips say? I guess our fight must wait." He replied.

They slipped into easy banter, talking about their families. Hawkeye lived with his father, his mother having died when he was younger. Carmen, too, had lived only with her father. Her mother had taken off when she was a baby, her father's unconventional ways and ideas being too much to handle.

"He protested the war, you know." Carmen knew Hawkeye had served in Korea, and hopefully would not be too upset. "He refused to go, and he left me in Austin with friends. Last time I saw him was when I was 13."

"He did what?" Hawkeye yelled in outrage. "Who would ever leave a child, especially one as wonderful as you? I hated war, and I still went to Korea. How could one shirk their duty to their country, and their family?"

"I think he loved me, and wanted me in one spot, and didn't know what to do with a teenager," Carmen answered calmly. She had made her peace with her father earlier. "I was starting high school, and Austin was the only home I knew. He was on the run, and having a teenager with him, racing around the Southwest and Mexico? Sure I was upset, but he did what he thought was right. I stayed with friends, and he sent money occasionally for expenses. That's how I went to school. After a few years, I stopped hearing from him. He may still be alive, but I knew he wasn't coming back, so I needed to have a career, to support myself."

Hawkeye looked at her, unconvinced. "I couldn't ever, ever imagine leaving a child. Aren't you upset?"

"I am, but I'm not, in a way, if that makes any sense." She looked at him earnestly. "That's why I left Austin, because if I stayed there, I would always be waiting for him to show up every morning, and disappointed every night when he didn't. I didn't expect to end up as far away as Maine, but that's where fate, and a job, took me. My heart's there, and at some point I will want to return, but not yet."

"Tell me more about teaching, then," he looked at her, noting her discomfort and her heightened posture. They swapped stories, him of young patients who were more savvy and aware then nervous parents, her of students who challenged her in every way when she student taught.

They talked over soup, salad and pasta, and Hawkeye ordered her a tiramisu even though she protested fullness. The two of them finished the last bite as the candle blew out. Hawkeye grabbed her hand over the table and squeezed it. He didn't let go. She didn't want him to.

"Mr. Romantic, my landlady already warned me about you," Carmen teased him. "Lights dimmed low and we're in a back corner by ourselves, no waiter around. Are you going to make me a damsel in distress?"

"I'm already in distress, thinking about the best thing that has ever hit Crabapple Cove is suspicious of little old me," he said, rubbing his thumb in circles on her hand. "Yes, I have been on a few dates here and there. I have a few relationships in the past, amazing women who I met in the wrong place, at the wrong time." Carmen could see the line of women from his past cross his mind. "But I like you! You fight back!"

"I like you, too, Hawkeye," she smiled at him. "Now let's go back before Doris turns into a pumpkin."

He held her hand the car ride home. She held it back. When they stopped at the old Victorian, Doris' shadow in the window could be seen from the car.

"Don't you think she looks pumpkin shaped?" Hawkeye asked her.

"Be nice, Hawkeye. I don't have a lot of friends here, so it's nice to have someone watching out for me," she stated shortly.

"Carmen, you've got me," he said as he reached out and touched her cheek. She stared at him. "Can I end this true first date with a kiss?"

She smiled and leaned in. It was a really nice way to end the evening.

As she walked up the porch stairs, he called to her. "Can I see you tomorrow?"

Carmen turned around and smiled. "Yes, but an early night, please. I start teaching in a couple of days, and I need to get my classroom ready."

"My chariot will be waiting at 6 o'clock sharp, my lady-in-teaching," he joked.

Carmen waved as he drove off, and floated up the stairs to her room, bypassing all of Doris' queries with a smile.

The days blurred into a happy week for Carmen. She worked, set up her classroom and welcomed her new students for the year. Every night that week, she and Hawkeye had dinner. One night, it was peanut butter and jelly in her little communal kitchen. He returned the favor with macaroni and cheese the next night in the little house he shared with his father. They went to a diner another night, feasting on fries and malts.

Carmen had enjoyed Hawkeye's father, Daniel. The same caustic wit, the same sparkling blue eyes. She knew he had raised Hawkeye by himself after the age of ten, with some help from the town. She imagined how difficult it must have been to watch Hawkeye spend those years in Korea, but lightness prevailed all evening. He teased Hawkeye about robbing the cradle, yet complimented Karen on her fine taste in aged gentlemen. At the end of dinner, Dr. Pierce the elder had toasted her, with firm instructions to Hawkeye 'not to screw this one up.'

After school ended on Friday, Carmen finished organizing the supplies needed for the next week, and straightening her desk. The classroom, with its bright posters on the wall and big windows, seemed oddly quiet after the bustle of a new school year. She and Hawkeye had plans for this evening; well, when he kissed her goodnight the evening earlier he had spoken about Friday night, but had not made anything concrete. No need to worry about it, however. The two Dr. Pierces worked at the town clinic, with them taking on call shifts alternate evenings. It was a quiet town, and not a lot of need for a doctor or a surgeon. The time was hers until 5:30 or so, when he left the hospital.

A loud clunk in the hallway knocked her out of the daydream. Carmen ran over to the door, and gasped. Crumpled, Hawkeye splayed on the floor, a chair askew next to him.

"Hawkeye! Are you okay?" she gasped, leaning over to pick him up. She staggered under his weight, then he bounced out of her arms and quickly set the chair right.

"My darling Carmen, your carriage awaits!" Hawkeye swooped his arms out over the now upright chair.

She gave him a kiss, and cradled his face in her hands. "Hawk, look at me. Did you hit your head?" She searched his eyes, looking at his pupils.

Hawkeye responded by picking her up in his arms, and sitting in the chair. "You see, I have always wanted to taking a rolling chair down the hallways of my old elementary stomping grounds. And now, with you as my willing..."

"You mean unwilling," Carmen interrupted.

"Willing," he answered with a kiss to her nose. "Willing accomplice, I will do just that." He pushed off, and they went gliding down the hallway. Carmen wrapped her arms tight around his neck, and giggled as they banged into a row of lockers. He spun the chair around, and they headed the opposite direction.

As the two of them whisked up and down the hallway, fellow teachers of Carmen's glanced at the giggling girl and the man holding her tight. All of them, native to Crabapple Cove, knew Hawkeye Pierce and his tendencies to love 'em and leave 'em. It was a shame it would happen to Carmen, who seemed so kind and sweet. At least she was enjoying herself now.

After they had careened back to Carmen's classroom door, Hawkeye tilted back, resting his head against the frame. "Ready for a nice night?" He asked her, slightly breathless.

"I am, I am," she replied. "I've never done that before. It's so lucky the principal wasn't around." Carmen glanced around self-consciously, realizing most of her fellow teachers were still in school, and would be happy to report to her supervisor anyway.

Hawkeye saw the slight frown cross her face. "Don't worry about it, Car-a-mel."

"Car-a-mel? What kind of nickname is that?" She looked at him.

"It's the one I gave to you." He kissed her on the tip of her nose. "C'mon, CC."

"Now CC?" She asked. "Oh, I see. Carmen Clayton. Hmmm, what can I call you? Everyone already calls you Hawkeye. What's my special nickname for you?"

"Loverboy?" Hawkeye wiggled his eyebrows at her. Carmen threw her head back and laughed. He pouted and murmured, "Not the reception I was seeking."

"But it was the one you got," she smirked. "Let me lock up, Loverboy." They had a good time that evening.

As school started, everything fell into place. Teaching was challenging, but fun. The children responded to her lessons, and she found she learned almost as much from them as the other way around. She and Hawkeye deepened their romance. He left occasional weekends to moonlight at Boston General, as a favor to an old friend, but most of the medical duties in town were light. If she had a parental figure, and Doris didn't count, she would be getting advice to take things slow and step off the fast train. She didn't, and it was not in either her or Hawkeye's nature to go slow. Both dove first and asked questions later. Carmen figured that the questions would come, and did they ever. The first hitch in the relationship came the night Hawkeye didn't show up for dinner. Carmen waited patiently for forty minutes, then went back into her room, changed and started making dinner in the communal kitchen. She worried but at the same time knew Hawkeye was a talented doctor and it probably would be worse if she had heard from him. She fixed and ate a quiet dinner, and retired to her room with a book. Her alarm woke her the next morning, and she quickly readied for school. The above the fold of the front page of the paper contained a grainy picture of a car crash. She didn't recognize Hawkeye's car, and put it out of her mind. She wished he would have found a way to get a word to her, but that could be addressed later.

The day passed not quickly enough, and Carmen ran out the door as soon as she could to the house Hawkeye shared with his father.

"Hawkeye!" She ran into his arms when he answered the door. He seemed to stand many miles away, even in her arms. She looked at him, curious.

"Are you here to yell at me?" Hawkeye accused her, pushing her arm's distance away. "Do you know what I did last night? I did not mean to stand you up, things just come up. I'm a doctor, and I can't turn a patient away who needs my help."

"The car accident is my guess. I'm glad you are okay." Carmen saw the pent-up energy in his question. She didn't understand why he was so upset, but tried to stay calm. Knowing her temper, the calm would be fleeting. "I understand, Hawk, I do. If you get a chance to call, please do. It doesn't matter the time."

"You don't understand!" Hawkeye roared. "The patient has to come first! Life always have to come first! There was no time to call. I can't always put your needs first." The lion in Carmen's heart roared at that. How dare he think she would stand in the way of an emergency patient?

"I do understand!" Carmen's temper roared up. She got up in his space and pulled on the sides of his shirt. "I would never stand in the way of life. You are a doctor. You save people's lives, and don't you dare think less of me by suggesting otherwise. All I ask is that I come first the rest of the time. Can you do that, Hawkeye? Can you put someone else in front of you, in front of your need to be the hero?"

Hawkeye silently stared at her, chest heaving and eyes furious, right hand reaching up to make a point. He opened his mouth to reply but she beat him to it.

"I mean it, Hawkeye," she warned him. "I've been left before, by my mother and my father. I can handle being by myself. I can take care of myself. I can handle being stood up. I can not nor will not handle being with someone who will not put me first. My parents already tried that, and I know what it feels like." Carmen felt the pain and fear of being left, that gnawing feeling in her stomach that had last appeared those first few days after her father left her in the care of a friend. Those fears dampened her anger, and she issued him an ultimatum. "If you can't handle my emotional baggage, better get him out of my life now." Hawkeye stood, silent. The air felt heavy, and Carmen started turning around, grabbing her bag. She felt her eyes water, but refused to let any tears fall in front of him. She would be the one leaving this time.

Quiet chuckling halted her. She whipped around, almost ready to throw her bag at him. Hawkeye saw the anger in her eyes and held up his hands. "I never thought I'd see the day someone asked if I could handle their emotional baggage. Me! I was in the loony bin in Korea, you know."

Carmen had heard about his instability from Doris, but had taken it with a grain of salt. "So? I don't care. We're not in Korea, or in Texas. We are right here, now. You haven't answered my question." She paused, bag in hand.

Hawkeye quickly crossed the distance between the two of them and took her into his arms. "I will put you in front of me, always. I will be your hero, and I will not leave you behind." He gave her a kiss on the forehead, and brushed the tears that had started falling on her cheeks. "I think we may have enough baggage between the two of us to furnish a house."

Carmen gave him a kiss. Both of them were hot-tempered, stubborn and saddled with boxes of emotional baggage. They would be okay.

"Listen, Carmen, I have a call to make. I think you need to meet my best friend." Hawkeye put his arms around her shoulders and opened the porch door. "Come on in, I'll call Beej, make us some cocoa and we can compare crazy. I will have you know I'm the craziest deemed-sane person you will ever meet."

She leaned in. "Make your call, and I will call your crazy and raise you. I'm crazy in Spanish, too." They kissed, and entered the living room. Carmen had never heard of love at first sight. Maybe love at first fight.


	2. Chapter 2

2) Our Story Resumes in 2004, as Told by One of the Younger Generation

The two men sprawled on the couch, the blue light and din of the TV shining on their faces. The laughter on the screen blared at the men, their weary ears no longer hearing as well.

"Ya know, Beej, we were just like them," the man in the red bathrobe said, gesturing to the dancing figures of JD and Turk on the screen. "Doctors, Surgeons, playing pranks, saving lives. We even had uniforms, just like them."

"However, Hawk, we did not dance like that," replied the man in the pink shirt.

"No matter. By the way, I'm Turk. I've got the smooth dancing moves," replied the first, holding and swaying an imaginary woman in his arms.

"What? No way. Not after that dance. Turk's bald, I'm pretty close. End of story, Hawkeye." The man in the pink shirt was shaking his head as the first continued to hum and murmur sweet nothings into the ear of his imaginary dance partner.

The two men bickered back and forth good-naturedly when the front door burst open.

"Papa? BJ?" A young women's voice rang out. Impatient clicks echoing off the floor meant trouble.

"Dani's home, Beej," Hawkeye stage whispered. "She's not going to be happy with us."

"That's right, Papa. I am not happy," announced the brunette walking into the room. "Another notice from the property manager! What did you do to poor Mr. Levin this time?"

"Why, honey, nothing at all," Hawkeye reassured his pretty young granddaughter. "Would Beej and I ever do such a thing?" he asked with his biggest blue puppy dog eyes.

Dani stared at him, and then BJ, who was doing a fine job of keeping a straight face. Then she burst out laughing. "Okay, I give. What did Mr. Levin do to deserve the enormous teepeeing? And you two, with the joint age of well over 150, how did you get the giant plastic snowman suspended above his deck?"

The two men burst out laughing. "Oh, you should have seen it, Dani," cried out BJ. "Crazy old Levin kept letting his dog water the greens out front. We asked him to stop, because this place is a high-class joint and all. And really, do you expect us to give you our secrets? Especially when we might need to use them on you?"

True, it was a low-rise off of the hippest street in Austin, with two bedrooms for the two old tent mates and a beautiful view of the Texas State Capital from their third floor balcony. Food, shops and entertainment were a skip away, which was good for Hawkeye and BJ, who were getting on in years. However, this also meant the property manager and the condo association would have no problem kicking the pranking duo out and filling the condo in a blink of an eye.

"Papa, BJ, please, please don't get put on probation again," Dani pleaded. "It's happened so often the homeowner's association president just hands me the notices every time she sees me!" Then she gave a very familiar mischievous grin. "Besides, my place is awfully cozy, and I don't have room for the two of you AND your egos."

Hawkeye grinned at his best friend and then looked with pride at his granddaughter. She came over to their condo for dinner twice a week, and they always made sure any man she attempted to date knew that she had very protective family members who happily cleaned their imaginary Korean War-era guns every time she brought someone home to meet them. Granted, not that either gun had actually been fired, much less existed, but the person who stuck with Dani wouldn't care.

"Dani California, what do you want for dinner?" Hawkeye asked.

"Papa, you know that it's not the most complimentary nickname in the world, don't you?" she replied.

"No matter. Mexican, Japanese, Italian, Sonic, ice cream? Culinary delights await my delightful granddaughter." Hawkeye spread his arms wide and gestured toward the street.

"What, I get to have dessert first? No specially cooked BJ Hunnicutt homemade meal?" Dani wasn't all that surprised. BJ was the best cook in their place, which wasn't saying much, and her grandfather probably wasn't all that appreciative.

"Nah, Beej felt he needed a night off from his role as galley-slave." Hawkeye reached for Dani's arm. She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and they began walking toward the door.

Dani knew her arrangement with her grandfather and his best friend was unusual for a 25-year-old. It was simple, really. Her parents met, not married and had a child, not particularly in that order, way too young. Her father ran off, leaving her mother with a little baby to go along with her fresh high school diploma. She died in a car accident when Dani was four. Her grandparents, always there when her mother had class, took her in, and they moved Dani in to their rustic home in tiny Crabapple Cove, Maine. This lasted until the day after Dani turned 11, in which Papa and Nana had sat down, looks of concern on their faces, saying the family was taking an extended holiday to Austin, Texas for a few months. It was Nana Pierce's hometown, and it was her burial-place, three years later. Her Papa, fleeing too many memories in Maine, decided he liked the warm weather and advances in air conditioning, and decided they, too, would stay in Texas. Her junior year in high school, BJ's wife had passed on. Papa disappeared for a month, then came back with BJ, a bunch of suitcases, and a set-up for a new sitcom. "My Two Gramps," Dani called it. BJ took the spare bedroom and the cooking duties, which both Pierces were thankful for.

The three of them had a special relationship. Dani always told the same story to describe it. Senior year of high school, she went with the school choir to New York City near the end of the year, Papa Hawkeye and BJ ever dutiful as chaperones. Being herded with 75 other choir members and chaperones and grandfather figures around an exciting city for a week on end was trying Dani's nerves, and she yearned to break out a little. Halfway through a speaker series starring some random and uninteresting storyteller, she convinced a friend of hers to sneak out and find a fun little joint, where they could hopefully sneak in, get some drinks, and really enjoy being in New York City. She and Darling Dave, as she called him, headed out at intermission to mingle. Dear darling Dave, male model pretty with an amazing sense of style and gayer then a drag show revue, was the perfect partner in crime.

They found the Blue Note, a club a block and a corner away from the theater. It was hidden, but no line, which was important, because their fake ids would not stand up to a bouncer. Dave easily passed for early 20s, and Dani, with her geometric black and white shift, wasn't bad-looking herself. They passed muster at the door and found a small table, each swirling martinis and people-watching with as much nonchalance as two 18-year-olds could muster. It was a mix of people of all ages, and Darling Dave swore to her that Ralph Fiennes was at the booth to their left. The room was backlit in a gentle blue hue as they swirled around the dance floor to the beat of the jazz combo band on stage. That was their one mistake.

Returning to their table, the waitress stopped by with martinis for the two of them. From the gentlemen in the booth, she indicated, and nodded in the direction. Dani turned and groaned. Sure enough, Papa and BJ were toasting the two of them. Dani and Dave grabbed their drinks and migrated to the booth. Turns out Hawkeye and BJ had found the storyteller as un-entertaining as Dani and Dave. They, too, headed to a club they had once visited many years ago, watching the crowds, flirting with the wait staff and admiring the couples on the dance floor.

Papa asked Dani for a dance. They swirled around the dance floor, Dani slightly buzzed and more than slightly nervous. He had said, "Dani my girl, what would your grandmother say to this?"

Dani replied truthfully, "She would say, 'Danielle Elizabeth Pierce, stop acting like your grandfather.'"

Papa had let out a roar and twirled her around. "True, true. We'll enjoy tonight, and then you will have a higher authority to respond to when we get home." He twirled and dipped her one more time toward the booth in the back, and she got a glimpse of BJ laughingly shaking his finger at her. The four of them had enjoyed the evening, and Dani's punishment was dinner duty for the next two weeks. Honestly, she didn't know who had it worse; her for cooking, or Papa and BJ attempting to eat the finished product.

There were some boundaries. Dani had her own apartment now, and her own career. True, she had stayed in Austin for undergrad at the University of Texas, living in the dorms, but Papa and BJ insisted she study abroad, so she did and then came back. Austin was her home, too, and it was easy to graduate, find a job and keep close by. Her two Gramps were not getting any younger, Papa at 83, and BJ a sprightly 81, although neither of them acted like it, amusing most of the people they met. She had lost a lot of family young, but the one constant was her grandfather. His best friend was a bonus. Maybe not so much their plots against their nosy, busy body neighbor.

Explaining their relationship earned Dani some stares, until the people questioning her met her Papa and BJ. Whether volunteering at her school or the veteran's hospital, domineering the homeowner's association meetings or charming the tourists in their little part of Austin, their quick wit and easy smiles paved the way for friendly relationships and a few memorable moments. All except for their nosy neighbor, who would be happy to send all three of them to the nearest lockup.

Dani remembered earlier in the week. The harried manager met her as she entered the building, standard manilla envelope in hand. She passed it wordlessly to Dani as they crossed paths. Dani groaned and headed up the flight of stairs, peeking into the envelope. Peter Levin, in the condo next to Papa and BJ's, had rebuffed all overtures of friendship, called and reported everyone in the building for noise and sight violations and never bothered to follow the rules himself. This led to often and occasionally hilarious pranks, which Dani would never admit to her two Gramps. The HOA manager had long given up trying to reason the elderly gentlemen on the third floor and simply handed notices to Dani, who passed them to Papa and BJ, who then burned them.

"You Saran wrapped his parking space?" Dani asked incredulously as she entered the condo, holding yet another letter from the HOA. "Are you insane?"

"No worries, Dani," her Papa reassured her, giving her a hug and a peck on the cheek.

"Levin was fine, his car was fine, and he better learn not to report us to the HOA," BJ added from the sofa. "Glass houses, glass parking spaces, you know."

"Besides, it's not like we were stealing and reading his mail," Papa added, as an aside trying to make her feel better.

"Yet." BJ gave her a smirk. Good Lord.

"Yes, the man is obnoxious, and yes, he shouldn't tattletale, but the more you bait him the more he reacts," Dani said with a sigh. "He bought a condo. He has lived there since all of you moved in a few years ago. He's not leaving in three months."

"Maybe he will," Papa said hopefully.

"Maybe he will realize that community living is not for him," BJ added.

"Maybe he will realize he is not perfect and the rest of us are not trying to live up to his standards of perfection," Papa added.

"Nah, Hawk, perfect Peter Levin is who we should all aspire!" BJ protested.

"Maybe you will run out of perfect pranking ideas?" Dani asked hopefully. She gave up, walked over and looked at the chessboard. "Who's winning?"

"I am!" BJ crowed. "Therefore, Japanese for dinner!" Dani laughed as her Papa pouted silently, and the three of them had walked to the elevator, just as they were doing tonight. It was nice getting to spend her evenings with the two elderly gentlemen on the third floor.


	3. Chapter 3

3) Peg Hunnicutt Can Handle It, as Thought by Her

The future Peg Hunnicutt prided herself on her ability to handle anything since a young age, often without having to say a word. She let her actions speak for her and let things roll off her like water off a duck's back. One of her proudest moments growing up was when a teenage friend convinced her parents to let her travel alone to visit Peg at school by stating, "If Peggy can't handle any thing that comes up, it means the world is coming to an end, and so we'll just have a good time anyway until it happens." Despite the flippancy in the tone, Peg recognized the awe in her friend's voice. In the end, her friend visited. The world did not end. They had a good time.

Laying eyes on handsome BJ Hunnicutt her third year of university, Peg knew she could handle that. Popular, fun-loving BJ had a wicked sense of humor and a propensity for jokes. She was one of the few who could best him in a duel of puns and could weasel out of practical joke trouble faster than he could. They challenged each other in classes and over dinners and on the dance floor. It wasn't long before she realized BJ was one of the few men who could handle her. They married shortly after graduation.

BJ's deployment to Korea was something she forced herself to handle. Being a single mother was the hardest job in the world, and she would handle it. Laying at night in their suddenly too big bed was hard to handle, but she could and would do it. Repairing gutters, balancing checkbooks and going back to work was easy; it kept her mind off of the lonely moments when Erin would be adorable and BJ wasn't there to meet her eyes. Moments like those reminded Peg of the moments right after an earthquake. You weren't sure the earth shook or the baby talked until you confirmed it with another person.

Peg knew BJ could handle her; she didn't know if he could handle the dangers of Korea and separation from his girls. That's when she found herself handling the written exploits of her husband's new best friend. From all accounts, Hawkeye Pierce was dashing, debonair and diabolical on occasion. He also was apparently devoted to her husband, for which Peg was eternally grateful. As long as she heard of all their different and often humorous adventures, Peg knew BJ was handling his situation. She and Erin were his life, the long-term goal. Hawkeye was his sanity, what kept him alive day-to-day.

When Peg lost the baby a few months after BJ's homecoming, she didn't know how to handle it. She didn't think BJ did, either, but he didn't leave her side, keeping all his grief and emotions bottled up for her sake. They muddled through the next few months together, until Peg realized she was handling it just by breathing. Each day, it became a little easier to breathe, a little easier to smile, but she didn't see that in BJ. Worried, especially as he lost weight and grew more and more haggard, she ventured into his study, shut the door and made her first of many years of calls to one Hawkeye Pierce, a man she had never spoken to before, only heard about. He was on her doorstep twenty hours later.

The tall, dark-haired flirtatious man swooped into her life, treating her not as a glass doll but as a human, a woman. He made her daughter giggle and eventually coaxed a smile on her grieving husband's face, reassuring her that he hadn't spent all that time in Korea keeping his best friend sane to lose him so shortly after returning to the States. He flirted outrageously with the neighbors, mucked up the plans for their new home in Stinson Beach and taught Erin several words of questionable content, like 'cretin' and 'horse hockey' but most notably 'Uncle Hawk is right, Dada,' which she repeated ad nauseam after Hawkeye spoke, annoying BJ to no end. And if BJ expressed annoyance, it meant he cared, and he was handling it, the loss of their child. Peg then and there named their new guest suite "Hawkeye's Room."

When Benjamin Hunnicutt was born a year and a half later, his proud godfather promptly flew across the country to hold him and giggle maniacally at all the trouble the two Benjamins were going to cause. Oh, did Hawkeye keep his promise. Little Ben was a hell raiser from a young age, so different from her angelic little girl, but loved no less. Little Ben helped keep an eye on his Dada, just as the bigger Ben did in Korea.

For years, Peg watched as Hawkeye traveled and flirted with girls and women on both coasts. The type of girls he liked didn't have enough flaws to put up with all of his idiosyncrasies in return. She was so surprised when, after a sudden phone call from Maine, BJ ran to their bedroom and started throwing clothes into suitcases. She followed him in to the room, aghast at the mess. "Hawkeye wants to propose!" He told her, all the while throwing both their clothes mishmash into the luggage. "I told him to wait until we meet her, so c'mon!" Not heeding the damage to her wardrobe, Peg promptly headed downstairs, made a phone call and threatened a certain gentleman long-distance with death and dismemberment by prank if he proposed without his other half's opinion. Besides, Hawkeye knew how much time it took for her to find a babysitter, so how could he be so inconsiderate? If he knew what was good for him, he needed to keep his mouth shut about marriage until they landed in Maine. Hawkeye agreed with alacrity.

BJ's parents thankfully came to stay over with Erin and Ben, BJ rearranged his shifts at the hospital and the two of them flew off. BJ had, over the years, kept Peg informed of all the times Hawkeye had fallen head over high heels in love and then fallen as quickly out when he realized that the current woman on his arm could not live up to his expectations. Peg had to hide shock and surprise that the woman of the phone call was the same woman on his arm weeks later when they landed on the East Coast.

Carmen Clayton was beautiful, yes, and oh so young. She could almost be Peg's daughter! But at the same time, she was fiercely intelligent, curious and when she thought no one was listening, could curse a mean streak of Spanish. Peg liked her immediately. BJ had told her of Carmen's sad family history, and Peg knew how Hawkeye needed someone who had no pretense of being perfect, someone who was as damaged as he was. Peg and BJ had built their relationship on similar thoughts and values, working through their problems quietly and side by side. However, that type of relationship would never work for Hawkeye, nor Carmen. They fought at full volume, both passionate and slightly crazed. Thankfully, both were also as stubborn as mules and not willing to give up on each other without a fight. Peg didn't think she could handle that type of relationship.

But Hawkeye could. If Hawkeye was happy, so was BJ, and therefore, so was she. So she had happily stood at Carmen's side after BJ walked her down the aisle to a brimming-with-happiness Hawkeye six months later.

It was the summer of 1962, ten years removed from Korea, when the phone call from Maine was surprisingly for her. Carmen Pierce had made friends in her adopted hometown, but she wanted Peg once again by her side as she gave birth. Honored, Peg was happy to handle that. The Hunnicutts flew to Maine for the birth of the Pierces' daughter, Karen, and Peg held Carmen's hand all the way through, just as she was sure BJ held up Hawkeye in the next room and kept him sober and semi-coherent throughout the night. Peg and BJ were the proud godparents, and Erin and Ben happily adored the baby girl, so opposite their sunny California coloring. Blessed with Carmen's exotic coloring and Hawkeye's blue eyes, Baby Karen was a beauty. Peace-loving Hawkeye soon joked about developing a shotgun collection to keep the boys away.

Peg and Carmen regularly and infrequently corresponded as only the mothers of young children could, and BJ and Hawkeye happily dragged their families across the country with regularity. It was a brief few years of happiness, despite the turbulent times. Ben, true to his namesake and more so than Erin, flirted with the counter-culture movement, but Peg and BJ both knew better than to expressively forbid any mention or behavior related to the summers of love, as to not make them even more tempting than they already sounded.

It surprised Peg how much BJ rebelled against the war in Vietnam, but very unsurprised her how hard he fought to keep Ben out of it. She also was not surprised when Hawkeye's anti-war effort antics landed both him and BJ in jail. Her husband's sheepish grin in the cell was enough to win her back. The times were changing. He stood by and sewed up young boys in one pointless war, and would refuse to sanction another. The Peg of twenty years ago would have blushed at picking up her half-naked, half-painted husband and his cohort in crime in jail. This Peg could handle it. The Hunnicutts could handle it, together. Ben had cleaned up enough to go to college and kept on deferment lists, despite his half-hearted pleas to serve. BJ rarely exposed the scars Korea left on him, and Peg worried her baby boy wouldn't be able to handle the same scars. Luckily she didn't need to worry.

Her god-daughter was the one to worry about. Karen Pierce, all of 16, shocked Peg when the news of her pregnancy echoed from the shouts from the walls of BJ's study. Peg, too, would be a grandmother, but Erin had recently wed, was almost thirty and a practicing medical specialist in Houston, not a scared teenage girl. All she could do to help Carmen was to listen, not saying a word as she sobbed into the phone. BJ and Peg offered to host Karen during her pregnancy, but Carmen had already lost her mother. She would not voluntarily lose her daughter. Once again, Peg and BJ flew to Maine for the birth. When little Danielle Elizabeth Pierce entered the world, Peg knew she and BJ, and Carmen and Hawkeye, could handle it. Carmen, who had returned to teaching once Karen started school, left her beloved second grade classroom once again to raise her granddaughter as her daughter finished up her high school and started college. This was a hurdle to overcome, nothing more.

It was the death of Karen Pierce, so young and vibrant, four years later, that made Peg question her own mortality for the first time. Carmen had lost her baby girl, Dani had lost her mother. How would anyone handle that? She dearly hoped she would be the first to die, as morbid as that sounded in her head. It seemed easier, that way. She pictured, when her end was near, BJ would be frantic, trying everything possible to save her, but she would be calm. She would call Erin and Ben over, kiss her babies goodbye for now and simply direct them to get their father to their Uncle Hawk as soon as possible. Peg had no doubts that BJ would find his way back to her eventually, he always did, but she wasn't sure where she would be going, and her babies, with babies of their own, still needed a parent. Erin's two little girls needed a grandfather, as well as any future family in Ben's future. She had no doubt Hawkeye would still be around. That one was a survivor, and he would make sure BJ survived, too. So many years ago, Hawkeye kept her husband safe, sound and secure in Korea for her. She knew he would do the same until the end of BJ's journey, when he would find her again. Korea had separated her and BJ briefly before. Death might separate them longer. They could handle it.


	4. Chapter 4

4) The Newcomer Observes, as Told by Himself

Andrew Roberts exited the elevator with a sigh. It was Monday early evening, it had been a long day at the hospital, and he was ready to go home and flop on his couch. He walked down the hall, oblivious to his surroundings. He put the key in the lock, noticing a piece of paper wedged into the crack of his door. Curious, he pulled it out.

"Dear Mr. Roberts," he read to himself. "Please be advised your behavior was very unbecoming to the residents of this community. We have standards in this building, and there will be punishments and restrictions on your rights and privileges if you do not meet these standards. In the future, do not leave your Sunday paper out until 1 pm. Sincerely, Peter Levin."

What is going on? Andrew wondered. Peter Levin was not the name of the property manager, and Sunday mornings were for sleeping in, not getting up at the crack of dawn to pick up your paper. Besides, he had barely lived in his condo for a week. This was ridiculous.

Shaking his head, he continued to open the door, until a movement caught his eye. Near the elevator bank, an elderly gentleman was hoisting one of the decorative photographs off the wall. On the opposite side, another elderly gentleman, this one in a Hawaiian shirt, grabbed the corresponding frame. Andrew couldn't believe it. First, an annoying complaint letter that made no sense from one of his "neighbors," and now two elderly thieves? He was about to say something when he saw the two men grin and switch the photos on the wall. His mouth dropped.

Blue Hawaiian shirt was the first to notice the audience. He nodded to his partner in crime, and stage whispered to the young man, "Want to help moderate our behavior? Or do you wake up bright and early on Sunday mornings, too?"

Andrew then realized he was not the only one to get a notice on the door. He nodded and walked over. "What are you planning on doing, and how can I help?"

"Well, we figured we could help change the perspective in this hallway a little. We're going to switch things around a bit, and see what Levin does then. You're new, aren't you?" Andrew nodded. Blue Hawaiian shirt continued. "How about a new welcome mat?" He grabbed the nearest one and shoved it into Andrew's hands.

"Also, some of these plants are kind of heavy," the other man stated, pointing at a door surrounding by greenery. He was tall and nearly bald, but had a matching twinkle in his blue eyes. "We figured we could loan some of these out to all the neighbors, except Peter." He grinned at Andrew.

"Glad to help, gentleman." Andrew picked up the largest pot, struggled briefly with it and scooted it over to his door. He could barely move it himself, but yet he had no doubt the two older gentlemen would have figured out a way to redecorate. "How long is this loan?"

"Oh, until Levin notices," Blue Hawaiian shirt said carelessly.

"And you'll know when he notices," the bald man finished. "We will hear it on the other side of town. I'm BJ, and this is Hawkeye, by the way. Care for a drink?"

Andrew nodded. His tiredness was disappearing, and he definitely wanted to make friends with these particular neighbors, or at least not be their chosen enemy target. "Andrew, and I've lived here a week."

"A newbie!" Hawkeye exclaimed.

"Shhhhh, you'll wake Peter," BJ hushed him. "Come inside The Swamp." Andrew looked up. Sure enough, an old weathered sign hung upon the doorway.

The inside of the condo was neat. Pictures hung up on the walls, lots of kids and grandkids, Andrew supposed. There was a huge juicer on the kitchen counter, and a chess board in mid-play on the coffee table.

"So, who is Peter Levin anyway?" Andrew asked.

"Well, he's the man who lives in between us, and he gives us old men a bad name," Hawkeye laughed. "You know, the type that rights cranky letters to the editor of the paper whining about the good old days, and kids these days, and everything these days?"

"And is so busy watching the behaviors of others he forgets to pick up his purse puppy's poo and we get to avoid it or get hit," BJ continued. "His personality is similar to what you wouldn't want on the bottom of your shoe." He paused, made a wry face, then continued. "Andrew, we have tea, water, any kind of juice you can imagine. Some harder stuff too, if you want it."

"Tea is good," Andrew replied. "Herbal, if you have it. I don't want disturb Peter Levin with my nighttime wanderings." He had wondered about who let their dog use the entryway and garage as a restroom. This would also solve the mystery of the teepeeing on the third floor, and the snowman hanging from the balcony next to his, even though it was August.

"You can crank it up, crank it down, have a crank in your muscle, be a crank, but we are not going to let that crank get the best of us!" Hawkeye nodded at Andrew. "I recommend the peach mango rooibos, by the way."

Andrew just nodded. He reminded himself to stay on their good side.

"Hawkeye?" he asked the man.

"Last of the Mohicans, my father's favorite book and only non-medical text he ever read," he replied.

"Medical? I've come to the right place," Andrew smiled. "I work at a clinic off of MoPac, and I'm affiliated with St. John's off of 38 and a half."

"Really?" BJ grinned. "Hawk and I were surgeons, still help out a little at the VA and my little girl is continuing the Hunnicutt tradition. She's an endocrinologist down in Houston. I've got a grandson in med school, too. What's your specialty?"

"I'm a GP, actually," Andrew smiled, somewhat apologetically. "I'm from a small town in Nebraska, near Omaha, and I always figured we needed a family practice doc more than anything else."

"Don't apologize for not specializing, Andrew," Hawkeye looked at him with piercing blue eyes. "I'm from a small town in Maine, and most of my surgery was not surgical, anyway."

"Now Andrew, don't get me wrong, but you seem to have wandered a bit away from Nebraska," BJ handed him a mug, then passed one on to Hawkeye. "The winters were too nice, correct?"

Andrew grinned. "I did my residency in Dallas, and loved weekends down to Austin, and San Antonio. I figured if I could get a job a little further down I-35, I'd be set."

Hawkeye raised his mug. "A toast to Keeping Austin Weird." The three clinked their mugs.

The night passed quickly for Andrew. Hawkeye and BJ were good company, told interesting stories about the children they worked with and people they met. They were very close-mouthed about their plans for Mr. Cranky Peter Levin, but assured Andrew they would let him know when he could be of help.

About three hours, an improved mood and many cups of tea, he thanked his hosts and headed out to his condo, two doors down.

"Andrew, wait," Hawkeye called out as he once again put his key in the lock. "Thursday is First Thursday, our monthly street party. Come with us. My granddaughter will be there, too, and she can introduce you to people your own age."

"I had a great time tonight, and I'm glad to meet people of any age," Andrew replied honestly.

"Hawk, what he means is," BJ smirked, "We're the maturity level of his age."

"I'll drink to that," Hawkeye raised his mug in the air as Andrew laughed and closed the door.

Wednesday night around 8 pm Andrew heard furious pounding in the hallway. He stuck his head out the door. A short man in a red jacket with a little light dog on a leash pounded furiously on BJ and Hawkeye's door. "Pierce, Hunnicutt," he bellowed. "I know what you did! This is a disgrace! You shifted everyone's personal decorations down a door. I'm talking to the property manager about this." He continued to pound even though no one was answering.

"Mr. Levin," Andrew called out, knowing instinctively who this was and inwardly laughing about the forty-eight hour delay. "Please know that your behavior now is very unbecoming to our community." The short man turned on him with a furious look. "I think our hallway decor is just fine. You should check your perspective." He smiled at the man and closed the door.

Thursday night at 5:30 Andrew knocked on the door to The Swamp. He'd have to find out the story behind that name sooner or later. A beautiful brunette with big brown eyes answered.

"Andrew, right?" she smiled at him. "I'm Dani, the responsible one of the bunch. C'mon in," she motioned into the living room.

"What's First Thursday, by the way?" He asked her, looking around for Hawkeye and BJ. Was this a set-up? By the looks of it, Hawkeye's granddaughter wouldn't be a bad date.

Dani followed his train of thought. "Don't worry," she whispered. "Papa and BJ haven't ever, have ever nor will ever set me up with someone. Be thankful they like you, by the way. Then they would have tried to set us up, and then come riding in to break us up. You've seen what they've done to poor Mr. Levin, haven't you?"

"Poor Mr. Levin? I'd lived here a week and already gotten a nasty letter from him," Andrew said with surprise. Why was she taking Levin's side?

Once again Dani appeared to read his mind. "Someone's got to stick up for the man. Even the property manager doesn't like him. I guess it's up to me to be nice since I don't live here."

"Are you close by?" he asked.

Dani led him to the balcony and pointed across the street, a little further towards the state capital building. "See the Starbucks? I live two floors above it. I love Papa and BJ, but I would go crazy living with them now. When I was in high school we lived in the same apartment, and it was like a bad sitcom." She paused for a breath. "Oh, I never answered your question!" She pointed down the street, where vendors were setting up. Andrew could see bands setting up gear, the hum of a drum circle, and plenty of people wandering about. "First Thursday of every month, the shops stay open late, bands play on the sidewalk, people sell fun stuff and we prove all over again that this is the best street in all of Texas."

Andrew looked up and down. "Uh, Dani? Why is that man wearing only a thong and a sash, holding a stop sign?" He rubbed his eyes, double checking what he had seen.

"Oh, that's our local tourism officer. He's directing pedestrians," she replied. "Papa, BJ, hurry it up! The locals are here, so that means things are getting started."

Both bedroom doors opened, and BJ and Hawkeye strolled out. "Shall we make our usual entrance?" Hawkeye doffed his beaten up Stetson and offered his arm to Dani.

"We shall, Papa dahling," she trilled at him. Andrew smiled. He had found a fun place to live.

They stopped for some Japanese noodles for dinner, even though Andrew seemed far more interested in the ice cream shop next door. "What?" he protested at her. "Who doesn't want dessert first?" She handed him a Chronicle and a menu.

"I hear from a little birdie you get the paper, but you need the independent weekly; it's required reading for what's going on around town," she said. "I recommend brown rice, if you aren't going for noodles."

Hawkeye was up first, teasing the order taker. Dani smiled at him. It was always nice to see an 80-year-something man gently flirting with a blue-haired nose-pierced twenty-something woman. She didn't know how her grandmother stood it, without collapsing into peals of laughter.

"Is he always like this?" Andrew asked Dani as Hawkeye proceeded down the aisle to pay.

"Yes!" Dani and BJ answered in unison.

"Now, when Carmen, Dani's grandmother, was alive, he directed 95% of his flirting at her. The other 5% was usually pathetic enough to get everyone around laughing," BJ explained.

"And now Papa has a rep to support," Dani finished. "It does help us get tables around town. No host or server ever forgets him, that's for sure."

Dinner went quickly, Andrew talking about his life in short bursts. Undergrad at Creighton, residency in Dallas, a new place here in Austin. No siblings, a father who recently passed away. He had been to Austin a few times, mainly to 6th Street, and loved walking around Town Lake. He had contacted an agent to help him find a place, and bought his condo, viewed only through the internet. No, he hadn't seen the bats, nor had ever had soup delivered via bicycle.

"Dani," Papa intoned, "You are in charge of his Austin education. This is a serious matter. Can you handle it?"

"My years in the education department have prepared me for this, sir yes sir," she jokingly saluted.

"Whoa!" BJ interrupted. "No military stuff around here. Ice cream for all!" They adjourned next door.

Walking with her fuzzy navel ice cream in hand, Dani pointed out fun facts about all the stores. Andrew, feeling less brave, stuck to Mexican Chocolate and eagerly asked questions. She told him about her classroom, with her new students coming the following week, and how Hawkeye and BJ came two times a week to help out.

"It's so much fun, the first day they pull up in their car. They roll in a lime yellow '67 Thunderbird, and stroll out in Hawaiian shirts. My first assignment is to have the kids write about their car. I teach fourth grade, you see, and the big test is writing that year. Whoever comes up with the best description gets their picture taken with the car, and placed on the bulletin board, until the next writing prompt. The kids love them; they make them write stories and create crosswords and teach them headstands and all sorts of things. It's quickly become a right of passage at my school, if you're in fourth grade you get to hang out with Hawkeye and BJ," Dani smiled at Andrew, her eyes alight with the passion for teaching. "It's still cool to like school in fourth grade."

"It sounds so much different then when we were in fourth grade," Andrew remarked.

"It is, so many more tests! I feel like I end up teaching down instead of up, aiming for the middle instead of the top. That's why it is so nice having Papa and BJ come in; it gives the kids something to rise up to meet," she explained.

The foursome passed an antiques store. Andrew studied an old phonograph. "This looks like fun," he pointed out. "I haven't really decorated, so I need to start finding things."

"I'd wait to come back, Andrew," BJ pointed out, seeing how there were no salespeople in sight. "You already have Levin keeping an eye on you. Don't add the police, too. This is your new home, remember?"

They browsed in antiques, craft stores, a mattress store, a small Italian trattoria and all the wonderful things South Congress had to offer. Dani had to pull Hawkeye and BJ away from dancing too long in the drum circle. "Remember, other people need room to dance, too!" she pointed out. Hawkeye and BJ stuck their tongues out at her, and all broke into laughter.

After completing the loop around, Hawkeye, BJ and Andrew walked Dani back to her apartment complex. She gave the elder gentlemen each a kiss on the cheek, and wished them a good night. "Sunday, 11 am, Jo's?" she asked.

"Affirmative, little one," BJ ruffled her hair.

"You, too, Andrew? Or is 11 too early?" she teased.

"I'll be there at 11, with my paper, and Peter Levin's, too, if I can swing it," he replied. Her smile lit up her eyes.

Sunday morning, Andrew was a block up the street from the coffee-house when he saw Dani arrive, paper in hand, at Jo's, standing in line, petting dogs here and there. The outdoor café, in the center of the street, was a perfect meeting place most of the year. It was a toasty August day, and he hoped they could find a spot in the shade. He quickened his pace and joined her in line.

"I figured your grandfather and BJ were spending extra time to style and smooth and wrangle a free extra espresso shot, so I came down here to look for you," he explained.

"You're probably correct with that one. I'm getting an iced soy chai, what say you?" she grinned.

Andrew ordered an iced mocha, and took out his wallet to pay. Dani protested, but he insisted. "Look at it this way, you can by me coffee next week."

Dani smiled at him. "Deal, but don't let Papa or BJ get wind of that. They, and only they, are the ones allowed to treat me to food without ribbing."

They grabbed their drinks and found a table in the back. Dani grabbed the comics, Andrew the Life&Arts section and sat contentedly in the shade, sipping their iced drinks. The rustling of pages were the only noise coming from the table until BJ flopped down next to them.

Dani felt a kiss brush the top of her head. "Hi, honey," Hawkeye ambled over, armed with a very large cup. "One shot for me, and two shots to go!" He cheered triumphantly.

"BJ, couldn't you have stopped the barista? Three shots? He'll be bouncing off the walls!" she complained.

"What are you talking about?" Hawkeye crowed. "I'll be able to keep up with you, Dani the girl. Speaking of, how was your run?"

Dani nodded affirmatively as BJ explained to Andrew. "Dani's our morning-glory. She wakes up early and goes running! On her day off, too. She did not get that from her grandfather's side of the family. Or her adoptive uncle's family. Or any sane family."

"You have to go early, or it's going to hurt, especially on a day like today," said Dani. "I think you could fry an egg, or at least bake cookies in your car. Pass me Sports, please." Andrew handed her the section. She took it, then proceeded to start arguing with her grandfather about the Longhorns' chance for a national championship in football that year. Andrew buried himself in the business section to keep himself out of the line of fire.

"Dani, I just found tickets up to Chicago for Thanksgiving. Would you be interested in dragging Hawk up to celebrate?" BJ attempted to interrupt the duel between grandfather, humming "Boomer Sooner" and granddaughter, humming "The Eyes of Texas," rather loudly.

"What's in Chicago, BJ?" asked Andrew. He had kept an eye on the two Pierces and one on his coffee, if either of them decided they needed a weapon.

"My son and his family live there. I rotate holidays between there and my daughter in Houston. Hawk and Dani are what is left of the Pierces, and you can see what happens when you leave them alone for long periods of time," pointing to Dani, who had started finding people in the crowd to hum and sing along with her, waving her arms as if she was a University of Texas drum major.

"Did Hawkeye go to Oklahoma?" Andrew asked.

"No, but he's attempting to rile her up, and get us kicked out of here at the same time." BJ slumped down and all of sudden Hawkeye stopped with a groan. "I know the way to shut him up. That should take care of this."

"My shin!" Hawkeye wailed, glaring at his friend. "I was going to win that argument!"

"No, you weren't, unless we were in Norman. Thanks, BJ," Dani smiled and then turned to Andrew. "I think we've got your first Austin assignment, next weekend." She pointed at the Metro section. "I believe the only way to eat hot sauce is when it's 100 degrees out, with no shade, in August in Texas. Bring two canned goods to Jo's next week, and we'll take the bus down to the Hot Sauce Festival."

Coffee passed without any further incident. They pointed out fun things in the paper, argued over the opinion columnists, plotted ways to get rid of George W. Bush, although Andrew had no idea where dressing up in women's clothing would help with that, and drank the ice dry. Dani took her leave after an hour, stating she had lesson plans. She promised to Andrew that she would take him out so he could start meeting people as soon as she had her social life back. It was on hold for the first two weeks of school, which started the next day. This was just fine with Andrew, as he had no objection to waiting for someone like her, but he could not miss the glance between the two older gentlemen accompanying them. He dearly hoped he was not going to end up on the receiving end of one of their pranks.


	5. Chapter 5

5) The Summer of '82, as observed by the Medical Community of San Francisco

Dr. BJ Hunnicutt was a well-respected presence around San Francisco General Hospital. His fingers no longer as deft and able as they were thirty years ago, he now took the simpler surgeries and mentored the newer surgeons on their quest for healing. Offered the head of surgery post several times, and several times he turned it down with a smile and nonsensical excuse like his new-found paragliding and knitting group. The board, the surgeons and the nursing staff greatly admired and respected him, so when several cases of sarcoma, pneumonia and bronchitis began killing what had been healthy young men and women, they called him in for an assessment. BJ fully admitted he had never seen anything like it. Problem was, no one else had either. There was great fear going on about how it could be contracted, if it only affected homosexual men and if so, how were previously healthy blood transfusion patients of both sexes getting sick as well? Was it the new-found AIDS disease? He asked, and received, a few months to study the problem, compare cases studies and blood samples and figure out what was going on.

"I will need the money for an assistant," he stated to the board, who happily granted an extra amounts of funding and themselves an unintentional future headache. The board had no idea Hurricane Hawkeye was about to hit, and BJ's plan was to take effect. The Pierces, still reeling from Karen's untimely death, needed some time away from the sad memories, and BJ knew just the place for them; specifically, someplace where he and Peg could keep a close eye on them. A few days later, Hawkeye, Carmen and Dani came to stay for the summer at the spacious house in Stinson Beach. Each day, the good doctors Pierce and Hunnicutt traveled to the hospital in search of answers for the patients, and hopefully, find something to ease the pain of the loss of the bright girl. Each day, they trudged home, disheartened by what they saw. Granted, they had made some progress on both fronts.

The nurses marveled at the funny doctor Pierce, who insisted everyone call him Hawkeye. Having been briefed about the loss of his only child, they admired his warm and occasionally antic bedside manner, for, despite his internal grief, he never let it show in front of the patients or the staff. He met the patients in a top hat and tails, scuba gear and sometimes joined the two, with much hilarity. BJ reassured the staff that he was always like that, and for them to lookout for a Groucho Marx disguise. Most of the nursing staff had experienced a form of the all-consuming grief the good doctor Pierce was experiencing, but from what BJ silently remembered from Peg's miscarriage so long ago, sometimes one needed to fake a smile to make it. Peg reported that Carmen was slowly emerging from her shell as well. Dani at this point was another matter, but the three of them would hit every child-friendly tourist trap in the city trying to bring a smile to her face. BJ regularly gave her piggy-back rides when they visited the hospital, much to her delight and his back's dismay.

The nurses also marveled at the banter and inventiveness of the two doctors. Protective barriers? Haz-mat suits? BJ and Hawkeye stuffed theirs and sent them rolling down the halls. They held drum circles and waltzed nurses down hallways. They treated their patients as humans, not lab rats stuck with an unknown and incurable disease. The patients were still dying, but at least morale had improved. However, this was not enough for the two of them.

"We figured out fevers and treatments and bears oh my in Korea, Beej, we can do this!" Hawkeye exclaimed as he paced around their little laboratory space, veering around medical students and residents who had also taken up their cause, a couple of weeks into the visit. "What haven't we tried? We put these beautiful heads of hair to work and nada!" He looked at his partner, who buried his head in his hands and groaned. "Oh, no, no, no! I refuse on grounds of humanity! Of perfectly coiffed heads of hair! We have stripped those poor patients of their dignity, stripped them of their health and even stripped them of their clothes! I refuse to strip them of their desperately needed oxygen as well!"

"Hawk, you know as well as I do, we need him." BJ reminded him. It was Hawkeye's turn to throw his face in his hands. "The two of us have made very little progress, with all the help we have here, and I hate to say it, but we need the help of that pompous proud prince from Massachusetts," BJ concluded.

Hawkeye groaned, and his 'no no no' echoed down the hallway, but all for naught. All of their patients were still dying. Most of these cases could be classified as a disease of the immune system but they hadn't figured out the cause. Granted, their former Swamp mate was too persnickety and too polished for most of their patients, even his some of his own, but they needed that big brain. So that was how Charles Emerson Winchester found his way to the west coast in the summer of 1982.

He greeted his fellow swamp mates at the hospital with a hearty handshake. "Gentlemen," he boomed, "Let us solve this problem once and for all. This dreadful west coast wasting disease has already traveled to Boston, as you west coast doctors are so untrained about how to stop it."

"Good to see you, too, Charles," BJ said with a wry grin, shaking his hand in return.

"I do hope the plane was able to take off with your big head in it," snickered Hawkeye. "Or did you power a hot air balloon to get here?" He gave a snort and threw his arms around a squirming Charles. All the while, the hospital staff circled cautiously around the three verbally dueling doctors.

"You wish, Pierce. Get off of me!" Charles straightened his jacket. "Despite the two of you, I would be delighted to meet your Peg, Hunnicutt, as well as renew my acquaintance with your feisty and delightful wife, Pierce. Hunnicutt, you may not know, but my bride hails from the great state of Texas, as well."

"Mrs. Charles Emerson Winchester is a Texan?" Hawkeye laughed at that. "Not a displaced Bostonian? Did she make a wrong turn at Albuquerque? My Carmen claims her maternal family is Mexican; they just happened to live on the wrong side of the Rio Grande when the war broke out."

"Your grandmother accepted someone whose residence didn't include part of Boston Common? Does she even consider anything outside of the original thirteen colonies part of the United States?" BJ teased the proud Bostonian.

"Oh, my wife proudly hails from Dallas, just as I do the marvelous city of Boston," Charles proclaimed. "We are proud citizens of this great nation, unlike you two cretinous louts."

"Cretinous American louts, you mean. By the way, what nation do her oil wells belong to?" BJ asked innocently.

Charles groaned, and the three walked to the lab area BJ and Hawkeye had commandeered for their research.

"Hey, Hawk," BJ said, "Do you realize this was also the first time Peg will met, in person, the incomparable Charles Emerson Winchester?"

"I am in the room, Hunnicutt," Charles protested. "Thanks to your letters, endless musings and pictures, I am sure we already know each other intimately." He gave a smug smile to the man at the desk.

"As long as that is the only way, Charles," BJ stated with a grin. "Any funny business, and Peg would pop you one."

"Oh, how did I survive these thirty years without this ingenious, enterprising banter?" Charles threw his hands in the air. "I may have lost thirty IQ points in the last thirty minutes simply breathing the same air as the two of you."

"But not thirty pounds," Hawkeye said snidely.

"Cretins!" Charles hissed back at them. Peals of laughter interrupted their argument. Peg and Carmen, with Dani in holding hands in between the two of them, entered the suddenly small room, guided by a member of the administrative staff.

"You're right, Hawkeye," Carmen said with a laugh. "There is nothing in the world as auditorally delicious as Charles saying cretins, especially when he directs it at the two of you."

"Carmen! How lovely to see you," Charles jumped up and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "And who is this delightful young woman?" He knelt closer to the ground at eye level with the girl. With a nudge from her grandmother, she spoke.

"I'm Dani Pierce. It's very nice to meet you," she reached out and shook Charles' hand, like a berry trapped in a bear paw.

"Enchanted, Dani. It's very nice to meet you as well," he shook her hand and stood up. "How do you do?" he said to the other woman. "You must be Peg, I have heard so much about you."

"Same here, Charles. It's very nice to finally meet you! We just wanted to stop by and say hello before we headed out. BJ has some things planned for the three of you, I know," Peg said with a grin. "Enjoy your time in San Francisco."

"You have some things planned, Hunnicutt?" Charles wondered as the women left the room.

"I do." BJ came him an enigmatic grin.

"Care to enlighten me?" Charles asked hopefully.

"I do not." The grin got wider.

"Cretin." With that, Charles turned around and buried himself into the work, muttering, "I am a surgeon. I do not know why I am here," loud enough for his former swamp mates to hear. Both ignored him. The room hummed with the activity as nurses brought in charts for revision, and other doctors and interns gave notes. Hawkeye muttered under his breath as BJ scratched away on a writing pad while the hours ticked away.

"Gentlemen, it looks like these are all what the Center for Disease Control is calling AIDS. I don't know what to tell you otherwise," Charles looked up from his reports and focused his eyes on the two doctors playing paper ball basketball.

"We know that," Hawkeye aimed his ball for Charles' head and found the mark. "What causes it? And more importantly, how can we stop it?"

"In surgery I sing! With these notes I snore," Charles responded. "I'm here for a week to help you two nincompoops figure this out. What are we doing tonight, anyway?"

"Just going out. Some simple reminiscing between old friends, Charles, relax," BJ implored him. "Nothing but dinner and a few drinks, and no singing or snoring."

"Well, I can get no farther today, and as the two of you as likely to play for the Celtics as you are to solving this, I suggest we leave," Charles snapped.

"Did Charles Emerson Winchester the Third use a sporting reference?" Hawkeye turned to BJ in amazement. He affected a haughty British accent. "I say, Jeeves, do drive down to the arena and please buy me a basketball franchise. Is the nearest one successful? Oh, wonderful. Celtic green matches the color of the rest of my money."

"Idiot." Charles hissed at him. BJ stepped in between the two.

"Look, let's have a relaxing evening. Hawk, you may have seen Charles on and off over the last few years, but I haven't. I would like to hear about what he has been up to." BJ turned to Charles. "I am glad you are here. These patients need us."

"Thank you, Hunnicutt," Charles said with a touch of humility in his voice. "Gentlemen, shall we?" The three doctors, still grumbling to and about each other, bade everyone in the room a good night and headed out for the evening.

The next morning, the same three doctors strolled into the hospital a bit later than expected, a little worse for wear, moaning and groaning and cursing the bright lights. The bickering didn't stop, but all three seemed to feed off of it. Charles stayed for the rest of the week, visiting patients and observing. Hawkeye finished out the month, still stumped. This time, as so often in Korea, they didn't get their answer.


	6. Chapter 6

6) The Autumn of 2004, as told by Dani Pierce

The first week of school was always a rush. It was Dani's fourth year, so she knew what to expect. She had seen the kids around as third graders, and had reports on their academic strengths and weaknesses. It was now a matter of setting expectations and finding personalities.

At 1:30 pm on the third day of school, Dani shuttled her charges outside, made them run two laps around the beaten dirt track. She was lining them up when a voice cried out, "Look, Ms. Pierce!" Jaden, her little punk rocker in the Catholic girl skirt and oversized safety-pin, pointed at a refurbished lime yellow Thunderbird, model year 1967 or so. The car pulled up in the parking lot as the kids began to whisper quietly. Out strolled Papa and BJ in sunglasses and Hawaiian t-shirts.

"Welcome, fourth graders of Ms. Pierce's class!" boomed Papa. "You may call me Hawkeye, and this is my best friend, BJ! We're here to challenge you, change you and champion you!" BJ began passing out pencils with big brightly shaped erasers and Dani handed out lined paper.

BJ took over. "You have twenty minutes to describe our car, and write it down on the pieces of paper Ms. Pierce is handing out. Make it at least four sentences long. And we mean good sentences. The winner gets their picture with the car upon the achievements board, as well as this mighty lei!" He held out a bright pink flower necklace. "Go!"

The kids took quickly to the task at hand. Dani saw Caleb, already her class leader, raise his hand and ask BJ, "What kind of car is it?"

"Good question, young man," he responded. "It's a Thunderbird."

The kids scribbled away, scratching, erasing and pausing to think. At 2 o'clock, Dani collected the papers and sat on a bench to read. Papa cried out, "If your birthday is in January through June, come with me! Everyone else, with BJ!" and pulled out 'Hoot' to read, BJ doing the same. The kids sat rapt with attention under the trees, listening to the novel they were going to start the year out with. Twenty minutes after that, Dani pulled the class together, having quickly graded the papers.

"For third prize, Foster! Please read us your description." Dani handed the paper to him, her smart but shy boy. He had great grammar but needed life to his writing.

"For second prize, Gina! Please read as well." Gina read haltingly. She had lots of life in her writing, but not a lot of polish. This one would be easier to fix.

"Our Grand prize winner, Shondi!" Shondi, a cute girl with pigtails and beads sticking out all over her head, took her paper back and read to the class. "Seeing the Thunderbird reminded me of going to a diner for dessert. The car is like a big piece of key lime pie with whipped cream on top. I pick the dessert out from the shiny display at the window. I hope it drives as good as it tastes!"

Papa gave Shondi a boost and helped her climb on the hood of the car. Dani snapped two pictures of the proud student with her camera, and herded the kids back inside to get ready to leave.

"Everyone, say thank you to BJ and Hawkeye!" The class chorused "Thank you" and a few ran back to get hugs. "We'll see them next Monday, don't worry." Dani called to her charges. The laughter and excitement about writing were a nice way to start the school year.

A few weeks later around dusk Dani made her way up the hill back to her apartment. She ran the Town Lake Trail a few times a week, visiting the bats under the bridge and experiencing firsthand how melty Austin was, even near night. She slowed to a walk, attempting to cool down but not accomplishing much. She saw Andrew walking further up the hill. She wolf-whistled to get his attention.

"Andrew!" she called to him, starting to jog up the hill to join him.

"Dani?" he turned and waited for her. "I'm proud of you, attempting to run in this heat. See why I go in the mornings?" He smiled at her.

"Too early," she groaned, smiling back nonetheless. "I need to be a school by 7:15 am."

"What are your plans for tonight?" he asked, knowing where she was most likely headed.

"Papa and BJ come visit my class, and they take turns reading a novel to the kids. This first one is "Hoot" by Carl Hiassen, and they made a movie about it. We are going to watch the movie together, and see if it is close to the story." Dani explained. "Want to join us? After I clean up, of course." She held her nose at him and grinned.

"You don't mind? I just don't want to intrude on your time with them," he asked her, coming to a stop at the front of her complex.

"I think they like having another doctor around. It reminds them of their glory days," she told him honestly. "Besides, maybe with a guest they will keep the running commentary down." Andrew agreed, and they parted ways. She cleaned up quickly and walked over to the condo complex and let herself in.

"Papa, BJ, I'm home," she called out. She slid the dvd into the player and plopped on the couch.

"I've got popcorn," said BJ as emerged from his room, veered by the kitchen, grabbed a big bowl and sat next to her.

"And I've got apple-carrot juice," said Papa, walking from the kitchen, as he handed out glasses and sat down.

"Oh, I invited Andrew over. I saw him walking around and figured he might be a little lonely." Dani said. She pressed play on the remote. The screen filled up with light, and the three of them began munching and sipping away.

"Jan I. Tor!" Hawkeye and BJ exclaimed as the actor from Scrubs appeared on the screen. Apparently he was the father figure in this movie. Dani groaned. Watching movies was always a challenge with the two of them. Adding a character from their favorite show? Hopeless. She hoped quotes from their favorite show would be kept to a minimum, but had her doubts.

Andrew quietly let himself in and sat on the floor, leaning up against the side of the couch. The third doctor watched as the two above chattered happily away. Dani shrugged and passed him the popcorn with a smile.

A few weeks later, Dani overheard arguing outside her window. Considering she was three flights up, the volume was impressive. She stuck her head out. Sure enough, her Papa and BJ were arguing over dinner.

"Hawk, I don't want to check out that band. We will see them at the Austin City Limits music festival next weekend," BJ helpfully pointed out. "Plus, if we eat inside it gets kind of loud. I would like to use my ears the rest of the evening."

"Hear? But I like to hear Americana, you like to hear Americana, it's un-American not to like hearing Americana. Plus it's right down the street. We can get barbecue at the same time," Dani could hear her Papa dangle the potential of delicious food as a bait for his reticent friend. "Mmmm, ribs!"

"Fine, fine, we will go." BJ threw his hands in the air in surrender. "But as your doctor, I don't recommend eating all what you are planning on eating," BJ cautioned him.

"And as your granddaughter, neither do I! Can you eat something healthy, Papa, please?" Dani called from above, conversing from three floors up.

"Healthy?" Papa cupped his hand to his ear. "I can't hear you. The music we are going to hear is too loud." She grinned at that.

"See? I told you," BJ pointed out. "Can you join us, Dani?" He yelled up to her.

"Sorry, I'm still working on lesson plans. Make him behave, BJ. We can eat unhealthy at the music festival next weekend!" She gave a wave, and watched as her grandfather and his best friend blew her kisses and wandered down the street.

The nights grew longer as the school year progressed. She had a good group of kids this year, so planning took less time than earlier years. Fall was always a wonderful time of year in Austin, as the temperature turned bearable and all the university students and activities returned to town. The twice weekly visits from Papa and BJ inspired marvelously written how-to instructions on yoga lessons, chess and Hawaiian shirts. She had even been the victim of a prank, directed by the two of them, albeit at a 9-year-old humor level, involving moving pieces of furniture in her classroom. Her fourth graders were happily writing a small novel about that.

Over Halloween, she helped decorate the third floor hallway along with Papa, BJ and Andrew for Halloween. There were only a few kids in the condo complex, but a determined Papa and BJ wanted to have a proper place for the them to trick-or-treat. Andrew put cobwebs in all the hard to reach places, while Dani covered the walls with pictures of pumpkins and witches, extra pictures courtesy of her class. BJ set up a skeleton with a stethoscope and a fake eyeglasses, nose and mustache set and Papa, well she watched her Papa rhapsodize about how much fun the little ones would have, comment on any extra set pieces they might add and fiddle with their decorations. BJ helpfully pointed out the average age of the trick-or-treaters was six, so they couldn't make the hallway too scary.

"Hawk, go do something besides mess with my masterpiece! Go knock on people's doors and tell them what we have planned." BJ directed him, swatting him away from waltzing with the skeleton. Papa set off for the first and second floors as they finished up. He returned in a few minutes, brimming with smiles.

"Plenty of people are coming up to pass out candy at seven. This is great! We've talked to everyone, except our very own crazy old man," he said, nodding at Peter Levin's door.

"Well, no time like now. C'mon Levin, come join us!" BJ knocked on his door. "I know you are right by the door anyway. We've got candy for you to hand out."

"No!" replied the muffled voice from the other side of the door. "I don't want any part of your stupid decorations or your stupid celebration."

"Levin! You don't have to do anything stupid!" Papa called out. "I'm sure appearing as yourself will be scary enough for the children."

The door opened. Peter Levin stood, backlit from the lights in his hallway, looking more eerie than he probably intended. "No!' he told them, and slammed the door in their faces.

"That went well," Papa remarked dryly, and they all laughed.

Her favorite prank of the fall happened in early November, before she, Papa and BJ departed for Chicago to stay with Ben Hunnicutt and his family for the week of Thanksgiving. Andrew inspired the prank. As part of his Austin education, he had happily joined the two gentlemen two doors down in having soup delivered, via bicycle. Peter Levin had of course objected to the coolers they left out in the hallway anticipating being filled with delicious soup, and complained, left nasty letters and even attempted to have them fined for 'devaluing the property.' So the three doctors, two retired, pooled resources and bought enough soup to blockade Levin's doorway. She could almost hear Levin yelling in the picture they took and proudly showed to her. Her favorite touch was the little stuffed wolf on top of the plastic container mountain. As BJ said, "He can truly cry wolf about the soup containers now." It was a win for all parties. Her two Gramps had fun playing a joke, Andrew was feeling more a part of their little community, Levin would hopefully leave the soup alone in the future, and the nearby homeless shelter had lunch and dinner for the day. It was a good way to prepare for Thanksgiving.


	7. Chapter 7

7) One Last Perfect Day, as Experienced by Carmen Clayton Pierce

"Hawk, can you give me one last perfect day?" Carmen asked one evening after dinner when Dani retreated to her room with armfuls of books, papers and homework. They had settled into Austin a few years ago after Carmen's original breast cancer diagnosis. After all those years away, all those cold Maine winters, she wanted to go home, and that was the time to do it. If she had to suffer through chemotherapy, radiation and a mastectomy, it would be near good salsa, peppers and fresh tortillas and nice winters. Hawkeye, about to retire anyway, transitioned into working at a local clinic with no evening or weekend call schedule, and Dani was at a good age to move. They found a little apartment with two bedrooms near a good school, and life seemed idyllic.

Now, Dani had just started high school and happily balanced schoolwork and the swim team. Carmen wasn't so happy about driving her to early morning practices at the pool, but it was nice to have some girls time as Hawkeye loathed early mornings and abdicated his early morning chauffeur duties long ago. The ideal life didn't last long. Carmen found another lump in her breast, and the look on the doctor's face was all the information she needed. Her cancer had returned, with a vengeance. It had spread to her lungs and brain. Hawkeye had characteristically quizzed the doctor on every single treatment available, and promptly volunteered Carmen for every experimental treatment they could get her into. She had said no, and they had a big fight over it in the parking lot. The doctor had given her a few months to live. The second doctor concurred. Realizing she wanted to spend her time with her husband and granddaughter and not in a hospital, she said no looking into the third opinion. That was another big fight, this time in the waiting room of the second opinion. This was nothing new; she and Hawkeye always fought, and always enjoyed making up. They loved each other, and despite the literal death sentence hanging over her head, they would get through this as well. They had made up before they made it to the car. Carmen knew Hawkeye had a few tricks planned to try to get her to attempt another round of chemo. She might let him win that one. But before she grew too tired or too sick, she wanted to experience the Austin of her youth with the most important people in her life, which led to her question.

A few evenings later, Hawkeye asked her to clear her schedule for the following Thursday. "We'll get Dani to swim practice and school, and I've talked to her coach. He's going to let her out of the afternoon practice. Your perfect day needs your perfect grandchild, according to your perfect husband." He grabbed her hand and started waltzing around the kitchen.

Carmen grinned and gave him a well-practiced look of innocence, still keeping time. "Perfect husband? Who's that?" She gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Sounds perfect."

That Thursday, with Dani safely dropped off at school, Hawkeye drove them out to an overlook by the 360 bridge. He spread out a blanket and laid out a brunch picnic, with beautiful views of Lake Austin and the amazing countryside. It was early autumn and they escaped the heat under the shake of a big oak tree.

"Treats for my sweet!" He crowed to her, showing off fruit and pastries and a thermos of coffee. "I never thought Texas would be as beautiful as Maine, but this view always takes my breath away. Just like you did at that swimming pool all those years ago in that yummy yellow swimsuit."

"Take your breath away? I ran into you. You're lucky I didn't take your wallet," she pointed out.

"You stole my heart, though." He paused. "Okay, sorry. That was laying it on too thick, even for me."

"You think that was laying it too thick? Remember our honeymoon?" Carmen gave him her best attempt at an evil grin. "In your attempt to upgrade our room into a suite you almost proposed to the desk clerk at the hotel."

"His girlfriend wasn't too happy about that," Hawkeye admitted. "But it was worth it! That room had a television and everything."

"So romantic for our honeymoon, Hawkeye." Carmen rolled her eyes at him.

"I don't recall watching any television, Mrs. Pierce." He waggled his eyebrows at her. She laughed and popped a strawberry into his mouth. They picked at the food, admiring the scenery, listening to the birds and the noises of the road and copse of trees beside them. Carmen leaned into her husband, still lean and wiry and perfect after all these years.

Their next stop was the Barton Springs pool. Carmen dipped her toes in 68 degree water and scurried out. "Too cold! Let's just sit nearby." The pool area was near empty. She took a deep breath. There were a few things she needed to say, and hopefully Hawkeye would be willing to listen. "I don't know how to say this, but, Hawk, I know you. You will never give up on finding a cure. So all I ask is, don't get too mad at me when I say stop. Just let me go."

"What? What are you talking about? There are so many things we can do, so many treatments to try, Carmen." He set his jaw and stared off into the distance. She always called it his super-doctor stance. "Don't you dare think I will let you go without a fight." He was starting to squirm. His normal behavior would be to stalk around and wave his arms and alternate making jokes and threats and not deal with the conversation. She tugged his arm to keep him close by, keep him anchored to her for a little while longer.

"I want to go. Please?" She pleaded with him, trying to melt that hardened exterior, trying to ignore his shaking hands. This was it, the time to let that little bubble of hope she had lodged in the back of her throat since her original diagnosis free, revealing the secret longing she had dreamed about for so many years. She just hoped it wouldn't hurt him too much. "I want my baby, Hawkeye. I want to see Karen again. I want to hold my little girl." Carmen watched as Hawkeye's face crumpled and he gasped for breath. She knew it sounded like she was giving up him. She wasn't. She just wanted to see her daughter again, no matter the circumstance.

"I waited more than half my life for that wonderful amazing girl. She was all I ever wanted. I got to hold her for a breath, a breath, and then she was gone. I want to be her daddy again. I can't wait forty years to see her." Tears started running down his face. Her Hawkeye was crying. It was the first time he cried since her diagnosis. "I waited forty years for you, too. You can't give up on me. I can't say goodbye to you."

She fell into his arms and cried out, "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry." When she had caught her breath again, she started wiping the tears from his face. "I wish you could be with us, Hawkeye. It's not that I don't want to stay with you, I do. It's just that I know I won't win this battle." She paused. "If I have a choice, I want to enjoy this time with you and Dani. I don't want to lose my hair and throw up for weeks at a time and have to recover from surgery. I want every possible breath with you and her. Then, I get to hold my little girl again. Please let me. Please, Hawkeye?"

"Okay," he said, staring off into the distance once more. She interlaced her fingers with his, bringing him back. He smiled at her, the handsome grin that charmed and won so many hearts over the years, hers most of all. He smoothed back her thick black hair. "I always promised to put you first."

They held each other tight and watched the water. Carmen longed for a smile on his handsome face. None was forthcoming, at least not yet. Maybe Dani's presence would help.

Sure enough, it did. Their beautiful granddaughter resembled Carmen physically, but came equipped with Hawkeye's quick smile. They picked up her from school and headed to the state capital building. Carmen had no special attachment to the building or the grounds, but it was home to some of Hawkeye's finest rants about the lack of Maine history in their lives, and how could one survive without knowing Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain and the taste of fresh lobster and maple syrup. What if Dani forgot about snow? How could he call himself an educated man if his own grandchild never saw snow? Carmen's sides hurt from laughing so much.

They had a delicious gingerbread pancake dinner and followed with a visit to the Bat Bridge. Hawkeye grabbed a blanket and Dani helped Carmen down to the grassy area. The day tired her out but she was firmly refusing to admit it. They gathered with the other people to watch the sight of a million and a half Mexican Free Tail bats stream out and start the hunt for dinner.

Hawkeye put his arm around Carmen, and she in turn pulled Dani in close. The three of them sat in silence as hundreds of thousands of bats streamed out from underneath the bridge. It was an amazing sight. So many little bodies, hurtling toward parts unknown, traveling so far and always returning to their nests under Congress Avenue. The sun set around them, the clouds changing color with each minute. The green grass, leafy trees and flow of the river led to Carmen's feeling of contentment.

Carmen left to see the see the bridge a little closer, braving the smell and the few last bats trickling out, wanting to give Hawkeye and Dani some time to picture their new life, a new life without her, she realized with a pang. She turned and watched her beloved husband and granddaughter stand side by side, his long arm loping around her. She etched that picture in her heart. They were lost in their own world. She was lucky to glimpse it.

Dani gave his arm a squeeze. "We're a team, Papa. Nana knows that."

Hawkeye looked down and kissed the top of her head. "I know, Dani. I know."

"I'll never leave you, Papa." She buried her head in his side.

At this, Hawkeye chuckled. "You better, Dani-girl. The world's bigger than Austin, as wonderful as it is. I'll miss you, but you need to fly, too."

"Okay, Papa. Can I always come back to you?" Carmen smiled at Dani's earnestness.

"Always. I'll always be there for you." Hawkeye would move heaven and earth to keep a promise. With this said, Carmen had the perfect end to her perfect day.


	8. Chapter 8

8) A Lack of Goodwill to All, as Seen by Peter Levin

Peter Levin watched from his slightly ajar doorway as BJ Hunnicutt finished the last of his decorations in the hallway; it looked if as a gift to the HOA manager, he would stay as generic and non-denominational and American and Texan as possible. In other words, Hunnicutt missed the meaning of Christmas completely and purposely. Red, white and blue streamers hung from the ceiling and walls of the hallway. A box labeled 'Goodies for the Troops' stood in one corner, next to a fake cactus covered in little knickknacks and ornaments found in the wacky stores on the street. White lights twinkled from strands hanging on the walls, along with paper snowflakes created by either by schoolchildren or Pierce and Hunnicutt with few drinks in them. It was as close to snow as they would ever have in Austin, and for that Peter was grateful. The whole hallway was gaudy, bright and thankfully up for only about three weeks, shorter if he had his way. Footsteps echoed down the hallway. Peter saw Hunnicutt turn and found Mrs. Rodriguez from 316 standing next to him. She gave him a quick smile and a "Perfect" before she exited to the stairwell. Fools. It looks like they had bewitched another resident into putting up with their flights of whimsy.

Where was the other partner-in-crime? As if on cue, Hawkeye Pierce entered the hallway, drinks in hand. "Eggnog?" He held out a glass to his roommate. Of course they were drinking in the middle of the afternoon. What alcoholics. Peter had no idea why everyone in the building found the two of them so charming.

"Is it spiked?" Hunnicutt asked, taking the tumbler from him.

"Is there any other kind?" Pierce retorted with a grin.

"Kind to my mind, maybe not to my liver," Hunnicutt responded.

"Speaking of, the hallway is one of a kind, Beej," Pierce held up his glass and they silently toasted and clinked.

"Mrs. Rodriguez was kind enough to give approval, for starters. Do we have any gifts to put in the box?" Hunnicutt asked.

"Besides the kind gift of our sparkling personalities?" Pierce cracked. "Not yet, but we can buy a few things this weekend. I have the list from the VA."

"How kind of you, good man," Hunnicutt attempted a horrid British accent, then laughed.

Time to break up the revelry. All Peter wanted was a calm, orderly hallway to match his calm, orderly apartment and his intentionally calm, orderly life. He knew he looked at life as a lemon, mainly because he did not like lemonade. He was perfectly content being the neighborhood grouch. Someone had to do it, and it wasn't the two mischief makers from next door. He opened his door and slammed it behind him.

"Uh oh, Churchill, trouble at 3 o'clock," Pierce warned, as the two of them swung around to meet him in the hallway.

"What have you done to the hallway, Hunnicutt?" Peter shouted at them. Granted, Hunnicutt was still a bit taller than he was, but yelling at others usually worked when he wanted to have his way. "This mess will take ages to clean up. People with good taste would be ashamed of this."

"I think my definition of good is different from yours, Levin," Hunnicutt said with a joking tone in his voice.

"Is this your war on decency, your war on Christmas? You persecute my beliefs." Peter shook his finger at the two of them. He was so tired of watching them hijack every meaningful thing in the world and make it a joke. "You're not funny."

"Funny?" Pierce's personality flipped from docile to near-deranged in a second flat. "Persecute your beliefs? A war on Christmas? Are you insane? We've got troops in Iraq and Afghanistan in a real war with real blood and real dying, and you call our attempt to brighten the time after the clocks switch a war?" Pierce, incensed, backed him into a corner. The older man grew taller in his rage. "I'm almost twice your age and half blind, but I know a fink when I see one. And you, you despicable little man, are a fink!"

"Ebenezer here does not like my decorations?" Hunnicutt said with an obviously fake pout. Peter swung his gaze over. Hunnicutt was often the cooler head of the two. His fuse burned slowly, but Peter had the feeling he didn't want to be around when the anger bomb went off. "And I even checked in with Martha Stewart!" He joined Pierce in the corner, making himself as towering as possible. Peter, deciding that confronting the two of them without witnesses was not the best idea, stayed mum. "Santa will put coal in your stocking, Levin, if you don't lose the bah humbug. C'mon, Hawk, let's go. The ghosts of Christmas past will start their visit soon." Hunnicutt placed his hand on Pierce's arm, and they shared a look. The two men turned around abruptly and left him quivering in their wake. He didn't think doctors were scary, but obviously these two had been 'special' doctors.

"Brilliant!" Pierce shouted as they walked toward their condo. "Ghosts of Christmas past indeed. Great idea, Beej! Let's give Levin a visit from the ghost of Christmas past!"

"I don't know, Hawk," Hunnicutt said cautiously. "I'm not dearly departed yet."

"We can dress our skeleton up in chains, play some reggae music and roll him out when Levin starts to torture us!" Peter was slightly hurt by their antics. They were plotting against him and had already forgot that he was still in the hallway, thirty feet away.

"Reggae, Hawk?" The taller man turned to his partner in crime.

Hawkeye waved his hand in the air. "I'll explain inside. Dani doesn't come over for holiday decorating and the Trail of Lights for another couple of hours. Let's get to work!"

Peter quickly made his way back to his doorway and inside, mentally plotting the letter he would write to the HOA. He sat down at his word processor and started typing away. A few hours later, he heard the creak of the stairwell door. He scurried over to the peephole and saw Dani Pierce do a double take as she stepped in to the third floor hallway. He could see why. It was lit with lights, streamers and now added the sounds of Bob Marley and the Wailers. The metal door creaked again. He saw Andrew Roberts enter the hallway, keys and briefcase in hand, stop in shock and take in the view. The couple looked at each other in disbelief, then ventured over to the cactus.

"That's BJ's handwriting on the box, and I've grown up hearing about how he played Santa over in Korea with tie dyed scrubs and decorated trees with tongue depressors, so I'm guessing this is mainly his handiwork." Peter heard Dani say.

"What about the 'No Woman, No Cry?' Roberts asked.

"I have no clue." Dani shook her head in amazement. "We have to figure this out." Peter wondered about the two of them. The lack of imagination in kids these days!

"The skeleton is Jacob Marley, the ghost of Christmas Past, but your idiotic grandfathers missed the boat completely," he informed them, opening his door.

Dani and Andrew turned around, surprised at his appearance.

"Mr. Levin? Is that really you?" Dani asked.

"Who else would it be? Are you as slow as your relatives?" Peter crossly replied.

"Hey, Dani doesn't deserve your ire," Roberts pointed out. "She's the only person here who defends you, which makes sense, considering she doesn't have to live next to you."

"She can fight her own battles, Roberts," Peter snapped back. The two of them looked at each other, and Dani laid a hand on Roberts' arm to calm him. Peter rolled his eyes. These two had made googly eyes at each other for far too long for nothing to have happened yet. "Oh, for crying out loud, why don't the two of you start dating already? It makes me sick to look at you." He slammed the door shut for the second time that day. He did stay close enough to hear the conversation, as well as view it through the peephole. It was better than what was on the television these days.

"Hey, what's the commotion?" Hunnicutt called out from the next door over. He and Pierce walked into the hallway. "Do you like our Ghost of Reggae Past?"

"I do!" Dani said with a laugh. "Although Mr. Levin doesn't. What did he do this time?"

"Say, Dani, what's Levin talking about, you and Andrew dating?" Pierce asked, sidestepping the question about their baseless attack on him. Ha! Apparently Peter wasn't the only one listening behind closed doors.

"I don't know," Dani said with a blush, as Andrew examined the ceiling for any cracks. "We're not dating. We haven't talked about dating, or anything."

"Well, Dani, we always encourage people to have a good, trusting relationship with their doctor," Hunnicutt cracked with a smile. "And if that means we would see you more often, even dating Andrew is fine." With that, he patted Roberts on the shoulder.

"Please don't prank me," Roberts stage-whispered. Pierce and Hunnicutt laughed. Peter had learned to dread that particular laugh.

"We will only prank you when you deserve it, like our lovely neighbor," Pierce told him. He raised his voice, and Peter could clearly hear him. "Speaking of lovely neighbors..." Pierce moved out of Peter's sight. What was he up to? Peter threw open the door to inspect what that troublemaker was up to now.

"Aha!" Pierce jumped into Peter's path and he shrieked. Pierce, Hunnicutt and Roberts burst into laughter, and even Dani couldn't help but crack a smile. Peter shook his fist at them. Why did they always pick on him? He was just curious about what they did, and being picked on made him angry.

"Serves you right, Pierce and Hunnicutt," Peter sneered at them. "If your granddaughter decides to date this lay about, you'll be stuck with him and his lazy attitude!"

Pierce and Hunnicutt let out a roar of laughter. Roberts looked more amused than hurt.

"It's your call, Levin, we will pay as much attention to you as you pay to us, or, from here on out, Andrew as well," Pierce warned him.

"After all, we simply must have to do a better job of looking out for the best interests of Dani," Hunnicutt continued.

"And if her new potential boyfriend has to leave his condo because of complaints from his neighbor, that would make us mighty unhappy," Pierce followed.

"And you don't want us unhappy. Imagine what we would Saran wrap to make ourselves feel better. We already tackled your parking space," Hunnicutt pointed out in a helpful tone.

"You could be our Christmas turkey!" Pierce chimed in. "What can we do to turkeys? Let's see, you can stuff a turkey, baste it, broil it, fry it, and I'll even tie a bow on it. I'm getting lots of good ideas, BJ. I feel better already."

Peter was so tired of their banter. "Fine, fine. Christmas truce. I'll stay out of your business until New Year's, and you leave me out of your pranks."

"Sounds like a deal to us," Hunnicutt said and stuck his hand out. "Merry Christmas, Peter." The other three quickly followed suit.

"Merry Christmas. Can you take your skeleton home, please?" Peter asked as politely as possible. He was going to enjoy the lack of disturbance as long as possible.

Pierce grabbed the skeleton and paraphernalia. "Merry Christmas, Peter!" The skeleton waved at him and the reggae tunes disappeared. Peter closed his door and wiped his brow. Peace and quiet and Pierce and Hunnicutt were mutually exclusive entities. From what he knew of their history, they had been incorrigible and inseparable since the Korean War. They would never stop enjoying life. Sadly, it looked like he was along for the ride.


End file.
